Small Town girl
by honeybun57
Summary: This is my entry for the Sacrifices competition. It's someone I've always wondered about and her motives for what she did.


**Small Town Girl**

" Ssssh"

She stepped carefully out of the low slung, red car cradling the whimpering baby secure in the padded baby carried strapped to her chest. She was acutely aware of the indrawn hiss of exasperation that came from the driver's seat.

" You sure you got everything, Della?" he asked.

" Tea, Johnnie but.." her voice trailed off sadly.

" Come on, Della we've talked about this, " The man's voice was calm, even a little cold but Della knew it well enough to detect the petulant impatience beneath.

" But..." she tried again.

" I'm not prepared to go over this again," he snapped. There, the impatience was clear for all to hear. " You know what you have to do and be quick about it we have to be at the party in three hours."

He lit a thin cigar, cupping his hands to encourage the pale flame, turning away from her. Della knew it was no use. She slipped off her four inch Jimmy Choos and put on the trainers that were a much better match to her black jumpsuit. Where she was going there was no need for glamour. Thankfully it was quite a warm Spring night and it was already dark enough to throw pools of impenetrable shadow between the houses. It might be several years since she'd last been here but Della knew she'd have no problems in finding the little farm that had been her home.

No, that was a lie because Dells had never lived here, she'd never been part of this little rural town with its tidy little shops, tidy little farms and tidy little lives. No, Joanna had been born in Mineral Town, Della hadn't been born until Derwent City.

Mineral Town was one of those pretty little places where the inhabitants lived peaceful, pleasing lives secure in the knowledge there was no place better. However, for Joanna, nothing and no one in Mineral Town pleased. She hated the place. She felt stifled by its complacency, its old fashioned ideals and its total lack of excitement. Sometimes the sheer claustrophobia of the place made her want to scream. Her mother had died when she was very young and her elderly, staid father found his defiant daughter impossible to control or understand. She wiled away her days dreaming of escape coloured by a surfeit of trashy, romantic paperbacks. So, when at fifteen, she'd met a handsome young stranger at the Spring festival she was primed and ready to fall in love. She disappeared into the night with her handsome lover, leaving Mineral Town without a second thought.

ODF course it didn't last. A fortnight later the handsome young man was gone but Joanna didn't care. By now she was with Adam and he had money. The fact that he also had a wife didn't matter to her, she was in love and being Adam's mistress was a whole lot better than being his receptionist. He set her up in an expensive apartment and escorted her around town while his wife remained in the country. That didn't last. He ran for office and Joanna, now Della, found herself neatly handed over to a 'friend' who would look after her. By now all notions of romance had gone and when Johnnie appeared she was ready. He was handsome, dangerous and he had money to burn.

The next couple of years taught her some serious lessons in life. Johnnie could be charming and generous but he was also unpredictable. She often had to do little favours for Johnnie, and she did them, if she wanted to remain in the luxury she'd become accustomed to.

Joanna had no idea how the pregnancy happened, she'd been so careful. There had been one or two close calls before but she'd always dealt with them. Now at twenty two she found herself pregnant and she hid it for as long as she could. She was lucky, she was slim and didn't show much at all. Then she had a real stroke of good fortune. Johnnie was involved in something that went a bit pear shaped and he had to leave town in a real hurry and lie low while things died down. While he was away she could write to him and tell him about the baby. He was actually happy about the pregnancy because it kept her out of circulation . So she gave birth to her daughter while Johnnie was still out of the country. At first it was fun dressing her up and showing her off to friends but then it became boring. Johnnie came home and he didn't like having their lives disrupted by some brat so he told her to get rid of it. How could she get rid of it? She might be a lousy mother but she couldn't just abandon the baby somewhere.

So here she was sneaking through the darkening evening, making for home. A couple of times she had to duck back into the shadows to avoid being seen but she made it back to the ranch without any real problems. She didn't have long. Johnnie would be getting impatient and she didn't want that, not tonight. Making sure she was alone she unfastened the baby carrier and laid it and the sleeping child in the box by the back door, the one intended for grocery deliveries. She knew that her father was a man of unshakeable routine. Right now he'd be at the Inn having supper. In an hour he'd be home for evening lock up and he'd see the child. She laid the bag of clothes, nappies and baby milk alongside the box. Looking down at the tiny face flushed with sleep, two huge fans of sooty lashes shadowing her cheeks Joanna felt a pain so sharp she almost cried out. She lean forward to touch her and a chubby little hand grabbed for her finger. This was her baby, her flesh and bone. She couldn't do this. How could she live if she did this the pain would be too much to bear. Perhaps if she stayed her father would forgive her and welcome her home. They could be one happy family, She might meet someone, fall in love and marry. They could live happily ever after

Even as she thought this she knew it was a lie. The face of her Philip Patek watch told her she was running out of time. Of course she couldn't stay. Within weeks she'd just revert to type, she'd do something stupid and it'd all start again. She couldn't take the kid with her. She knew that she needed Johnnie, he didn't need her. Already his interest was flagging and he was looking for younger, fresher women. She knew if she wasn't careful she'd soon be moving on, possibly down and that wouldn't be good for the kid. Hell, what kind of mother was she she hadn't even given the kid a name. Quickly, she pulled a piece of paper from her pocket and scribbled a note

' Please look after May, dad. I love her but I'm not in a good place now to care for her. I'll be back when I can.'

Jo.

May, well it was as good a name as any and, even as she wrote the last line she knew she'd never be back.

Half an hour later as she stood by the car changing from her jumpsuit into a tiny Lycra dress she struggled to hold back the tears. Johnnie smiled at her as she got back into the car. Her make up was immaculate and her long, black hair coiled up above her long graceful neck. The minute dress with it's revealing cleavage and barely decent length showed every inch of her sleek figure. Johnnie leant across her and snapped shut the sports car door stroking her leg as he moved back to the steering wheel.

" Cheer up, Dells, you'll soon forget the brat," he murmured. " I tell you what, you just be real nice to Marty tonight, I mean real nice, and there'll be a little present in it for you. That's good isn't it."

He started up the car and Joanna just muttered and looked away from him, she couldn't speak. Deep inside her she knew he was right but didn't make her feel good. As they pulled away onto the motorway she silently called out to her baby and the life she might have had. When you were a high maintenance lady like her some things just had to be sacrificed, you couldn't have it all.


End file.
